I have found that the promises that are the most important are the one’s we make to ourselves. I believe that you should keep your word to everyone, but most people tend to break their promises to themselves much easier than if someone else is involved. When we’re dealing with others there is a sense of true accountability and that is the same level of commitment we should have towards ourselves.
So many times I promised myself I would go to the gym more, or dress up more or read certain books. Then a series of events somehow throws my momentum off and I let that commitment to myself go. I think “hey, it’s just me, so no one will know.” But our minds are always keeping score. Self esteem and confidence are directly connected to our overall well-being and if we can’t be trusted to keep a promise to ourselves, what else can’t we be trusted with? Before you can move to the next level, you have to conquer the level before it….right?
These days I take the promises I make to myself much more seriously because I understand that life is not a dress rehearsal and no one becomes successful by accident. We must force accountability on ourselves if we ever plan to change. The only sustainable model for lasting change is to make our new habits apart of our daily lives.
How do you keep yourself accountable to yourself?
We live in a world that tells women to be self confident but if they acknowledge their own beauty, they’re viewed as conceited. We live in a world that tells us that education is imperative but if a person acknowledges their own intelligence, they’re viewed as a snob. We’re told to love and take care of ourselves is important but when we chose ourselves over others, we are called selfish. These double messages are confusing and we are left to wade through them, never knowing if we’re being perceived in just the “right,” way. It can really tax our mental and emotional health trying to keep up with what others think or say about us. I want to tell you not to care. In many ways that can be unrealistic, so I’m saying not to care to the point that it clouds your ability to discern.
One of our basic human needs is to feel loved and accepted. However, this need doesn’t factor in if people may resent you for reasons that are beyond your control. Needing to feel accepted often clouds one’s ability to judge others true intentions. Everyone will not think that you’re the greatest thing since sliced bread and you have to be okay with that. It’s their loss, really.
Standing in your own light may cost you relationships. If you have been shy and unassuming and now you’re beginning to acknowledge and walk in your own brilliance, it may scare some away. People don’t like change. When you start altering their perception of who you are or what your potential is, they will often reject you. This is something you must be prepared for if you want to live up to your highest potential. We’re either going to go after our goals with reckless abandon or we’re going to choose a life that doesn’t offend anyone and doesn’t impact anyone. The dreams in your heart were put there for a reason. Be brave. Stand In Your Own Light.